Daft answers to Exam questions

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Daft answers to Exam questions

Postby GeordieJedi » Thu Apr 30, 2009 3:29 pm

Hi all, I had another random thought running around my head, that I thought I'd let

Does anyone have any funny/daft experiences whilst answering questions in a test
or exams?
I thought you might enjoy one of mine....

No 1.

I was sitting a maths test (SATS) in year nine (quite a while ago now, I think I was
around 13? iirc). Anyhow, one of the questions was something like this...

Q) If there are 5 people wanting to use a lift (elevator for our North American friends)
and altogether they weigh 500 Kgs (inc their clothes and bags/ briefcases). And the
lift will allow a maximum of 1058.219 lbs max weight, to be lifted in one go.
Can all the people travel in the lift at once?

(I'm not entirely sure of the exact question now. However Its along these lines, and it
was a lot less clear cut than this. (The basic premise being that with a bit of mental
and mathematical effort you were supposed to find a way for all of the people to
use the lift at once).

(After giving this quite a bit of thought)
My answer =
A) Yes, all the people could use the lift at once, IF they take all of their
clothes off, and leave their bags/briefcases behind.....

(Not bad I thought. A little bit of lateral thinking?) What do you reckon?

No 2.

This didn't actually happen to me, but a friend of my mates.

The lad in question was sitting a German language exam. He decided to write "I am a
fish" al over the exam paper (Not even in German I might add!)
And yes, I do know this originally comes from Red Dwarf But I think he may have been an
even bigger fan than I was.

So anybody else have any?
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RE: Daft answers to Exam questions

Postby Rhakios » Thu Apr 30, 2009 5:59 pm

A good many years ago, there was supposed to be a question in a physics CSE exam asking why you shouldn't connect an oven to the ring main. One pupil answered, "because it's a gas oven." As the type of oven was not specified in the question, this had to be marked as correct.
Bye, Rhakios
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RE: Daft answers to Exam questions

Postby johnhudson » Thu Apr 30, 2009 7:59 pm

Allegedly an Oxford student faced with a chunk of Greek prefaced by the single word 'Translate' did so into Serbo-Croat.

However a friend of mine did have the experience of having to do the same maths paper at the end of year 1 and at the end of year 3 (with a few hints from the year 1 paper removed) for his university degree.
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RE: Daft answers to Exam questions

Postby Grimnir512 » Thu Apr 30, 2009 8:37 pm

I tend to write snarky comments about the question if it sounds stupid, though no examples come to mind.

On a related subject I once did this as an answer to an essay:

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Postby huwgreen » Fri May 01, 2009 7:31 am

In years gone by, the University where I work had, as the start of the final year exams a General Essay Paper which was supposed to ease candidates into the exams. One question was "What is courage"
The answer given was "This is"

Allegedly the candidate received a first
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Postby heiowge » Fri May 01, 2009 8:38 am

I had a college friend of mine who (allegedly) dropped acid before his history mock GCSE exam.

He wrote a fantastic paragraph opening his argument. Then the same paragraph. Word for word, comma for comma. And again. And again. 17 times in total.
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Postby heiowge » Fri May 01, 2009 8:39 am

This one is a classic exam answer. I love this one.

Dr. Schambaugh, of the University of Oklahoma School of Chemical Engineering, Final Exam question for May of 1997. Dr. Schambaugh is known for asking questions such as, "why do airplanes fly?" on his final exams. His one and only final exam question in May 1997 for his Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer II class was: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof."

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

"First, We postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave.

Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, then you will go to hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. Two options exist:

1. If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.
2. If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the quote given to me by Theresa Manyan during Freshman year, "that it will be a cold night in hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have NOT succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then Option 2 cannot be true...Thus, hell is exothermic."

The student, Tim Graham, got the only A.
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Postby ollie » Fri May 01, 2009 9:10 am

One of my colleagues had a student hand in a mangled floppy disk with a note attached, "But the dog really did eat my homework". Teeth marks and holes clearly backed up this statement. They were given a one week extension :lol:

The floppy disk is still on display, attached to the wall in a classroom :D, just above this image.[/url]
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Postby AndyBaxman » Fri May 01, 2009 9:48 am

Not an exam question, but a question from the original "Genus" edition of Trivial Pursuit....

Question: "What was Prince Philip's rank in the Royal Navy"

Answer: "A submarine"
Bomb #20: "Let there be light"
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Postby M-Saunders » Fri May 01, 2009 2:46 pm

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Postby MartyBartfast » Fri May 01, 2009 2:58 pm

One of my favourites:

I have been touched by his noodly appendage.
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Postby majortomgb » Fri May 01, 2009 5:00 pm

I've just sat an assessment test, one of the questions asked if I could name the next version of Windows. My answer was Ubuntu followed by the correct answer, another was could I describe what Malware was. I wrote software written by a bloke called Malcolm, followed by the correct answer.
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Postby Rhakios » Fri May 01, 2009 6:50 pm

M-Saunders wrote:Clicky

Obvious why that one is wrong: the question asks one to explain the graph, not describe it.
Presumably the student did rather poorly at his English homework too.
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Postby smallfish » Fri May 29, 2009 1:29 pm

The answer to writing the word "Fish" all over the exam paper happened before Red Dwarf. At Liverpool University Physical Chemistry second year in 1987, my mate Rob really did this. He thought he had answered everything correctly. A week later in front of everyone he was picked on and asked how he did by the professor. Rob said OK but had problems on a couple of questions. He was then asked to explain his answered and were he went wrong. At the end, in front of everyone he was shown his paper with the word fish millions of times. He did not believe that he had done it. He was awarded a pass based on his verbal answers in front of everyone and the professor said it was common for someone to do this out of every year. We did not hear of any others doing it and have ribbed Rob about this ever since. Mind you, he works as an accountant and has forgotten everything to do with chemistry along with the rest of us.
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Postby Octagon » Fri May 29, 2009 4:40 pm

Yeah my mate only last week answered a GCSE citizenship question 'when was cruelty to animals made illegal' with the whole of the Star Wars story, from Yoda teaching Luke to the Death Star blowing up! He gets A stars in every other subject but with this exam he could not be arsed. I couldn't be arsed either, I was desperate to the toilet all the way through the 2 hour exam so my mind was on other things rather than the questions (like jigging my legs and not looking like I'm holding myself). Oh well it was only worth half a GCSE.

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